6.30.2014

Letter to Silver Nyx.


Silver Nyx Sharif.
Born Jakarta, June 6, 2014
3440gr / 51cm

Dear Silver,
You were born on week 41. I've been waiting for you since week 38. The doctor said your due date can't be any longer than June 5th, due to the womb condition and your health. Me and your father pray everyday, hoping you will kick the womb before the due date. I know you might feel so warm and comfortable inside. So we decided to give you your middle name 'Sann', it means comfort, peace and quiet. After a long wait and we've been through a lot of process on the weekly check up till daily check up, June 5th came and you're still calm inside my womb. Your father and i decided to induce the labour. You know what Silver..., I did the pregnancy yoga, morning walk and all the things pregnant lady should do..., but, you just love to stay inside the womb :)

June 5th has passed. Your father slept on the chair at the observation room. The pain i felt is nothing compare to the excitement to see your face. The doctor said, you will be out in 8 hours, me and your father were so happy and nervous in the same time.

June 6th. About 30 mother sees their baby's face that day..., and i'm still here waiting for you...
Night came..., i told your father maybe tomorrow..., i still can hold the induction 1 more day. Since yesterday, the doctor and nurses has done so many things to me, checking up your condition inside and out. At 10pm, i told your father to go home and make a dinner for Bill, while the nurse is putting the CTG on my stomach (to record your heartbeats). For the first 10 minutes, your heartbeat was great, just like yesterday, and even like 4hours ago (because they do this CTG process every 4hours till the labour time). Suddenly, your heartbeat is gone. Flat. No movement. No heartbeat at all for about 10second. I was a panic, i called the nurse immediately. The thing i'm really afraid is happened. The doctor said might be something happen to you Silver, and you are too old to take a risk, your age is 10 months and 1 week. I was so shocked, i cried a lot. I asked the nurse to call your father as there was no signal on the observation room. I was blank and tears all over me. After half an hour, your father came, he hugged me and calm me down. Doctor took me to the operation room while he was phoning all the team to come to the hospital, everything was urgent, it was almost in the middle of the night. I keep on praying, i hold your father's hand so tight. I couldn't remember much, i was so shocked, blank and my heart so blue... What happen to you my Silver child? That's all i can remember...

On the operation room, i didn't really care anymore about what the doctor will do to me, all the team introduced their self to me and tried to make me smile by asking the meaning of my tattoos. I didn't answer that much, i'm scared. I wasn't prepare for this way, but i keep on crying..., i'm afraid bad thing happen to you, Silver... Your father was there with me, he hold me tight and telling me everything will be okay. Few minutes later, you were born, the doctor asked your father to see your condition. The cord knots is all over your body, and that's why your heartbeat were stopped for few seconds when i'm on CTG process, because you were trying to push down but the cord knots is all over your body. You were not crying. But there was a short sound of yours, and your father said you are so cute and you have this birth mark near your right ear. I cried, i never felt this way before, cry of happiness, cry of mixed feelings...

I should have 6 hours fasting for the operation, as it was urgent, i didn't do that procedure. So on the operation time until i got you on my chest, i was a little bit fly, i can remember everything, hear every words, but my vision was not that clear, blur.

Silver, before the doctor's team took me to the post observation room, i only can see the hospital lights, but i kept my brain work normal even though it was hard, i only want to remind your father to take a picture of you before i sleep. I couldn't make a loud sound, as i remember, i only can whisper... One by one, people visit me to the post observation room, it was your father and your aunts, they said you are gorgeous, you have beautiful face and skin, you cry exactly like me and your nose is my nose :). Your father comeback and brought me your picture on his mobile phone. I see your beautiful face with my blurry eyes..., you are my heart, Silver. You are my love at the first sight, just like when the first time i met your father...

Baby Silver..., most of time, i prepare big day in my life so well..., till the moon got jealous and the sea always love to see... But, sometimes the end of the story is not as smooth as i planned. The end of the story is God will, and i only can try all the possibilities and give all my best. All the pain disappeared when your father told me you are healthy and you're just looks like me :), i just can't remember anymore, your smile is the cure of my blue heart..., i love you son. Me and your father decided to change your middle name before i got to the operation room. 'Nyx' is the second name on my list, it means 'Night' :). As you were born in the middle of the night and the labour process is suddenly change, so i think i need to change your middle name :), from 'Sann' to 'Nyx'.

This is my first letter to you... One day, i know you will read this post :). Me and your father will take care of you, learn every single thing how to raise you..., maybe we can not give you so many things, but we do have so much love for you... You can be whatever you want to be when you grow older, all we want is you can be a person with big heart and full of love in your life. You were born in June, same month as your father's birthday and our anniversary day, you have same zodiac Gemini like your father and same ship horse like your father :) Without any plan, we just find out that your birth date is same as my idol Soekarno, June 6th :) You must be special my Silver child :)

Welcome to the world my baby, Silver Nyx 1st son of Omar Sharif.
You are the new pantone of our life, and you will shine bright like a Silver Sky.

Love,
Ibu

6 comments:

Arina Nahya N Nafia said...

congrats! :)


http://finalexpectation.blogspot.com/

STARSNAPSHOT said...

wow.. congratulation cindy, he's shining silver :)

nabilla sari hidayat said...

welcome to the world baby silver!
goodluck <3

www.sparklingspike.blogspot.com

Haybey said...

congratulation kak cindy :))
OMG, I can feel that happiness.. :')

Quirkyjelly said...

congratulations kak cindyyyy
aku terharu bacanyaaa....


welcome to the world, baby S :)

Cikita S. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.

yeahs!